To be enough.

Just the other day, I was having a casual catchup sesh with Mel over Skype and she told me that she is dating again. I was happy as hell for her because her last relationship.. let's just say it didn't end so well. Then she said that the new guy she is seeing now is out of her league and I told her that she should dismiss that thought straightaway. I mean, by thinking like this, you are already setting yourself up for, you know, failure in the relationship - you face the constant need to feel validated and be worthy of him/her. The other party will eventually grow tired of pacifying you every two minutes and fights will occur increasingly. Nonetheless, I am no expert in this field myself and this here is just my two cents.

What I'm trying to say here is actually. All these supposed upbringings of humility have become an insecurity of being not good enough, all these supposed upbringings of striving for the best have become setting stifling expectations and a competitive nature, all these supposed upbringings of empathy have become a mirage of optimism with no hates (who are we kidding really???) and the list goes on further nyeahh.

So yes, what I'm really really trying to say here is (HAHA I know I digress a lot I'm surprised you are still reading on). Your mind can conceive and achieve what it wants to believe. As much as you hear people constantly yapping about fuck what the society thinks of you and just be who you are, that is only half true. Cross my heart and hope to die. You are the people you surround yourself with. It is your colleagues, families, classmates and your friends that ultimately influence you to think what you believe in. Learn to forget about the sorrowful past (if you do have one) and surround yourself with optimism and life will shine bright for you.

To pessimistic adults/independent beings: Your upbringing may have mould you into who you are today and you may hate yourself for it or may be feeling sore about it, don't be. What matters now is not to be bitter about the past and constantly remind ourselves to be happy in the things we are doing today for a better tomorrow. Be satisfied and grateful with what you have.

Now back to the casual Edmund rant of life, it is one week to CNY and I am so friggin' excited!! I am imagining myself filling up with all the pineapple tarts, love letters, barbequed pork and stuff. No calorie counting and a fishbowl tummy for a food baby. ^^